Let's be friends ?

Remember The Golden Girls? This may date me something awful, but I remember it well, in fact, it was my favorite show for a long time and I still enjoy the reruns every now and then.

My favorite character was Rose and I don't really want to know what that says about me. In one of the earlier episodes, Rose is distressed because there's a co-worker she just can't seem to get to like her. Dorothy tells her she can't expect to be loved by everyone...to which she replies, "But I do want to be loved by everyone!"

Now, I don't know if I really want to be loved by everyone. I'm not even sure I love everyone, although I'm sure my tolerance of other people has much increased over the years. As an adolescent, one is easily intolerant; I suppose it comes either from being self-centered and therefore intolerant of everyone who is a potential rival in the spotlight, or from being idealistic, and therefore intolerant of everyone who does not meet your high standards. Over the years, you become less self-centered (one hopes) and possibly also a little less idealistic (one fears), so tolerance of others increases.

What I do tend to do is go overboard when I like someone. I go all out and try to turn what sometimes is at best a casual acquaintance into a friendship. Not because I NEED that friendship, but because I feel I have much to give to people, in terms of support, wisdom, humor, understanding and experience. Many times, I get rebuffed or ignored, and that really is a hurtful experience. I try to console myself by saying it's really their loss more than mine.

I guess what I want to say is, when people offer you their friendship, why not accept it? See if it works for both sides and I'm sure you'll be surprised at the insight and advice you will gain.... and give.